That’s sorta how I feel today…
Not in a bad way, or in a depro way, or even aimed at just one thing…
There is just so many good, fun things in my life at the moment, that I can’t help but sit and wait in anticipation for the shit-creek to hit me…
And in this mood even the baddish things, don’t seem so bad…
The good, happy, fun things include…
– Salary increase
– New car for The Sister
– Discovery of great new music
– Discovery of new movies
– Writing almost daily, even if its just a poem, or a letter, or one chapter in the ever evolving novel…
– Watching movies with good company
– Having semi-adult ‘sleepovers’ =]
– Losing weight, slowly but surely
– Dyeing my hair
The bad things, that seems not so bad in the hazy golden glow of happiness…
– Being used by someone twice my age (and kinda kicking him out of my life… Which would explain how this seems ‘not so bad’)
– Knowing my movie-watching company is going back home soon…
– Not feeling all that ‘pretty’ these days
– Seeing The Sister sorta sad about lost-and-found love
– Not writing as much as I want to
– Financial issues with The Mother that just never seem to get finished…
– Not getting any compliments on the newly dyed hair
As I’m reading these over I realize how very ‘high school’ I sound, but then again. That was a simpler time, when salaries and groceries and work haven’t made an appearance yet. Now I’m sitting at work, writing and being happier than I ever was in high school…
And I think its simply because I don’t allow the little things in life screw me up anymore. I go with it.
Yes, some days I will drink too much Jack, and lose about 3 hours in which I (apparently) freak out about all the little things. But in my general, daily happiness, I don’t let these things have an effect on my. Because I am ruling this life of mine.
This is my movie, and my script won’t allow it…
Find something to be happy about today.
That two seconds of smile, of childish happiness, is so amazing, it could just change your whole day around…
It takes time,
it can be awhile…
You will see…
I was there
Ready to fall
Wrong time, wrong place
But I can see.
Maybe I was foolish.
Simple, to pretend.
But I once heard
We are fated to pretend.
To do as is expected
To not care
But this is me,
I can see a little care.
I can see a little care.
You care much more
Than you are able to pretend away…
I try to see.
I try to pretend.
Mostly I just pretend to see…
I haven’t blogged in ages…
But I don’t feel guilty, because I didn’t have anything to say. So I would’ve just babbled for the sake of babbling (and we all know I like to babble)
So I guess me writing this means I have something to say?
I have discovered a few things about my self since the start of 2014 and I thought I have to write them down, as this blog is as much for me as for who ever is reading this hole in the web…
- I love falling in love. With everything…
- I am, apparently, an emotional self-mutilator, because as mentioned above, I love falling in love…
- A taste for Jack Daniels, Italian coffee, frozen yogurt and cereal for breakfast has been developed.
- I write a lot better than I think I do (and I have the pride to say it now. I still don’t think I’m the best thing since JK Rowling, but at least I believe in myself now)
- Too little people understand the fun and art of old-fashioned letter writing.
- Sleep and reading is two very very real addictions
- And, lastly, I don’t want to fall in love…
Try making sense of that, internet…
I know, I know… I am way back into the dog box! But the PC is STILL messed up and I just can’t find time to post!!!!
So here follows another randomness update on my life!!
I’m back into writing!!! I wrote one and a half short stories this week and I have been thinking about my Afrikaans novel A LOT!!! Once my PC is fixed I will try and finish of a chapter or two!
I had a ‘badish’ work week! It is almost time for me to hear if I am officially appointed [I was on a 3 month probation term] and due to all this stress of wanting to be appointed, I am making STUPID mistakes… Nothing major, but big enough for me to fret about!!!
One day last week [or sometime] SuzyPie and I went out for lunch and we came about the subject of colours… How would YOU describe colour to a blind person, a person born blind!
Imagine not knowing how the sky looks like, we take it for granted… Well we came up with a solution, a rather silly idea actually, but then again, all my ideas are! =]
Tasting colours…. Think about it for a moment… What colour do you taste while eating the following???
- CandyFloss [pink]
- Chocolate [brown]
- Liqourice [black]
- Grapes [purple]
- Strawberries or cherries [red]
- Bubblegum [blue]
Yes I know I am weird!
Movies watched these past few days… Burlesque: Totally utterly STUNNING!!!!!!!! And yesterday we went to go see Love and other drugs: Kinda weird to start with, but once you get the feel of the movie it is really a beautiful love story!!! And there is no better actress than Anne Hathaway!!
I went for a driving lesson in Sister’s car… I nearly killed half the town including us and then almost thrashing her car twice!!! I was never so nervous in my live!!!! I am clearly not ready for a drivers license!!!
Me looking STUNNING in my antique sunglasses and pwetty hair! =]
Oky, I am all out of news! As always I will promise to try and write more, but if I fail, I am not dead! =] I am just busy!!
Every time I fall of the face of the earth, I promise you I will blog daily, I promise myself to do it! I make it my 2011 Resolution… And then, then I disappear for 3 weeks and blame myself daily for not blogging!
I do apologize! I hate not blogging, I hate not reading blogs, I hate not WRITING!
I am proud of myself. I have a goal in life, sure it involves ‘friends’ overseas and blogs and Harems, but at least I exist for more than just existing!
In the few months [almost a year] I had this blog, I discovered the best friends ever, the love I have for postcards, flash fiction, journals, scrapbooking and general creativity. Something I always thought I lacked.
I started to see myself as a stunning person, a divine being with minor faults and loved me a lot! And you guys taught me that I am great….
This is the reasons why I constantly promise to blog daily, why I blame myself when I don’t and why I love to do this to myself…
Enough with the soppy!
I am back [semi] and loving it!
My PC is still broken! I am taking it in this weekend, but don’t hold your breath! Meantime I am juggling work and social life, my sister has to use her PC and the internet is constantly interrupted by weather and mice[RATS!!!] eating the wires!
SO I will blog when ever and how ever I can! But will try my hardest to get the celebrations up by Saturday!
I am also introducing a new ‘blog regime’ and a few new pages… [My resolutions and a 20 before 20 list]
If any one [MARK!!!!!!] still wants to send me a 1000 comments celebrations guest post, please do so before Saturdays [late entries will be added!]
Love you all!
[still trying to catch up on blogs! Have about 70 subscription e-mails in my Inbox!!!]
Hey lovely readers og my blog!!!
This post is all about apologies!!!
Well, because it is my blog and I can say what I wanna blog about! =]
- Apologies to Kellie for neglecting her 25 days of Christmas wish-list!
- Apologies to THIS guy, for still not completing his questions!!
- Apologies to MYSELF for not finishing my journal challenge!
- Apologies to all of you for not blogging so frequently!
- To all I need to apologize to and have forgotten/didn’t know
But I know apologies alone cannot solve the problems, so I will try do finish the journal challenge before week-end, as well as the questions [surveys] for YourJadedVoices.
As for my wishlist, I am hoping to resume regular wishing tomorrow.
For now, me and my lovely sister are going to the movies [yes AGAIN!] and I am anticipating a night of great fun!!
Be good y’all!! =]